March 26, 2020

Experiencing the death of a loved one during the coronavirus is extremely difficult for families. For most families their grief has been put on hold and they don’t know where to turn. Services can be held with only a couple people and families so often are not permitted to be present for their loved one’s burial. Would any of us ever have imagined this would be happening? No, but this is where we are and during that death and right after we need more than ever to be available to family and friends. Right now for many that sharing of memories is halted but you can help. Reach out to your family or friends who have experienced a death during this time with memories, cards, texts, emails, phone calls, skype, a virtual hug, a listening ear and any other way that you know would help. This is only a temporary fix for the time being but down the road have a memorial service, celebration of life, luncheon, something so you can reach out to those people in person and hopefully feel their hugs. More than anything remember and feel your loved one’s love, close your eyes and feel a hug from him or her. Also look for those signs they give you, write them letters, journal and share your memories, maybe even make a memory book. Don’t be afraid to reach out to others for memories so you can put that special book together. Find something of your loved one to carry with you, to give you strength and maybe a little bit of peace. There are many people today who are not able to say goodbye or telling them everything you wanted to tell them. If that is you, write a letter to them. That always helps. One thing I always tell people is when you are grieving you find out who your best friend really is. Often it is not the person you thought it was. So find that trusted friend, the person you can tell your story to over and over. Above all Be Gentle with Yourselves and love yourself. During this time, I am not meeting with anyone one on one but I am a phone call away. I will listen to your story and journey with you on these uncharted waters.

Sister Pat Fesler,HM Grief Support Specialist Higgins-Reardon Funeral Homes